How to Beat the Holiday Blues

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Coping with the Holiday Blues

Thanksgiving kicks off what I like to call the “triple threat”—Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year’s—the trifecta of holidays that can leave many of us feeling low.

If you’re like me, being pressured to make “happy happy” during this season can sometimes be a real downer. Family conflicts (and who doesn’t have those?) can make the obligatory joy and gladness feel like one big cruel joke. If you’re already struggling—with relationships, work, money, or a major life event such as a breakup, divorce, or the loss of a loved one—you may wish you could skip the festivities entirely.

But often, non-participation isn’t an option. And for others, the thought of spending the holidays without family or friends can feel unbearably lonely.

The good news: there are ways to lessen the emotional fallout this holiday season.

10 Tips for Getting Through the Holidays

1. Recognize Physical Symptoms of Stress

Emotional distress often shows up first in the body. If you feel exhausted, ask yourself whether it’s purely physical or linked to anxiety or depression. Symptoms may include stomach upset, insomnia, irritability, or restlessness. Awareness is the first step. Once you identify what’s going on, you can take action.

2. Explore What Your Symptoms Mean

If your symptoms are physical, slow down, rest, and adjust your habits (like diet, caffeine, or sleep). If they’re psychological, ask: What feelings am I suppressing or ignoring? Guilt, obligation, resentment, anger, or grief may be at the root.

3. Be Kind to Yourself (and Others)

If you’re not feeling well, forcing yourself to attend a holiday gathering may make things worse. Sometimes sitting out an event is the kinder choice—for yourself and for those you love. Trust your inner voice, even if it tells you something different from what others expect.

4. Talk It Out

Share your feelings with a therapist, trusted friend, or family member—just not at the dinner table. If no one is available, write in a journal. Putting thoughts into words often helps release them.

5. Watch Food and Drink

Alcohol tends to amplify emotions and can worsen anxiety, depression, and sleep quality. Overeating may feel good in the moment but often leads to regret. Practice moderation—you’ll thank yourself later.

6. Get Your Sleep and Exercise

Both are powerful mood stabilizers. Enough said.

7. Be Proactive if You’ll Be Alone

Plan ahead. Stock up on books, movies, or projects that bring comfort. Reach out to others who may also be spending the holiday solo—you’re not the only one.

8. Lower Your Expectations

Norman Rockwell’s vision of the perfect American holiday is just that: an idealized version. Real life is far messier. Adjust your expectations to what’s realistic for you this year.

9. Create Your Own Rituals

Who says traditions can’t change? Maybe this year is less about receiving and more about giving—time, kindness, or support. Create rituals that reflect your values instead of clinging to ones that don’t fit.

10. Practice Mindfulness

Remember: the holidays come once a year. For some, it’s a joyful season, and that’s okay. Acknowledge their right to celebrate as much as your right to feel differently. And take heart—thankfully, the season always passes.

Final Thoughts

The holidays can be a joyful time, but they can also bring grief, stress, and loneliness. By validating your own experience, practicing moderation, and creating meaningful rituals, you can navigate the season with more balance and less pressure.